As a dog returns to its vomit, so a fool repeats his folly. (Proverbs 26:11)
A hot-tempered man must pay the penalty; if you rescue him, you will have to do it again. (Proverbs 19:19)
The prudent see danger and take refuge, but the simple keep going and pay the penalty. (Proverbs 22:3)
On more than one occasion, my wife and I have discussed a mutually held insight about human behavior. It is this: some people do not seem to possess a “consequence module” in their brains. We all do things without thinking and end up slapping our foreheads at our own lack of foresight. But my wife’s experience teaching middle schoolers and mine working in the entertainment industry have confirmed that many seem unable to link words and actions with their inevitable consequences…no matter how many times they are warned.
On two occasions, prominent men—one with seven marriages and one with four—told me, “I don’t do marriage well.” It is clear that they were unable to see the consequences of marrying the people they did, despite their previous painful failures. I’m willing to assume that someone warned them both about one or more of the brides they took…and, for that matter, warned the women of the men they were marrying.
Proverbs makes heeding warnings and learning from wrong decisions major factors in wisdom. Conversely, not learning from wrong decisions is at the heart of what the Bible calls “folly” (aka stupidity). In a rather grossly explicit passage, Solomon and his friends describe the scene in which a sick dog revisits the scene of his upchucking unthinkably dumb behavior, when you think of it. But—in the nature of dogs—a very predictable practice.
Principle: If they are learning experiences, bad decisions are building blocks to wisdom and good character. If not, they are not building blocks but wrecking balls.
Not only is repeating stupid decisions a mark of a fool, so is having repeated explosions of anger. Proverbs 19:19 comments on the person marked by such blowups—the “hot-tempered man.” The counsel is to let him suffer the full consequences of his explosions. Rescuing him from the consequences has two results. One, it keeps the angry person from effective-but-painful cures, and two, it draws the rescuer into an endless spiral of continuing rescues! The same counsel fits a number of other foolish behaviors. You’ll have to rescue again and again!
Principle: Breaking the chain of stupid behaviors is not only wise; it avoids the repeated agony of their consequences and protects relationships with those who love you enough to rescue you.
Neurologists say that repeating the same or similar act three times builds a synapse between nerve endings. This establishes habitual behavior, and habitual behaviors are more impulsive than rational. Repeating these behaviors still more turns the habits into either character traits or addictions. When the repeated behaviors are unwise ones, the result is bondage to folly, a bondage only divine help can break.
Principle: To avoid bondage to destructive behaviors, one must live by the principle “One stupid act is enough!” After three or more, only the Trinity can deliver you.
[from “Wisdom for the Trenches” by Dr. Larry W. Poland]