He who winks maliciously causes grief, but a chattering fool comes to ruin. (Proverbs 10:10)
Who winks with his eye, signals with his feet, and motions with his fingers, who plots evil with deceit in his heart—he always stirs up dissension. (Proverbs 6:13-14)
Picture the people of the Middle East. Long flowing robes, headbands, and…sunglasses! One might think that the glasses are to deal with the bright, desert sun. Yes…and no. You will see the glasses worn when the sun isn’t shining, even inside.
Often, they are worn to hide the wearer’s eyes when gaming or negotiating. You see, early on, Middle Easterners learn to read the eyes. They can tell if you have a good hand of cards or a bad hand by the dilation of the pupils or the tension in the muscles around the eyes, for example. In missionary training, we teach reading of “non verbal communication.” The position of the hands, arms, legs, and feet gives messages. The pitch of the voice, an “open” body position versus a “closed” one—they all speak volumes.
Solomon and his friends knew those secret messages well! They knew about the hidden signals that snooker a novice gambler and cheat him out of his winnings. A wink here, a shuffling of the feet there, a touching of the left ear twice—and the opponent wins another hand.
Principle: God wants us to play fair, but to be aware that our opponents may well cheat. Learning their deceitful ways is a good defense.
While there is a dispute over which mode of communication is the most trustworthy—spoken words or dilation of the pupils, for example—it seems clear that the communication method that cannot be consciously controlled can be trusted most. Speech tends to be less trustworthy than most nonverbal communication. Proverbs warns us about this.
Typically, nonverbal signals are used to cheat. They are tools of the trade for dishonest people. Picture your favorite Western movie in which one player in a poker game is caught cheating. You expect that the next scene is one of conflict, maybe a shoot-out! Proverbs predicts that cheating with secret signals “causes dissension.” You can count on it.
Principle: One “deceitful heart” causes conflict even if all the other hearts are honest.
PS. I haven’t even mentioned what the clothes you wear say about you. If a woman steps into public with her body parts only partially covered and the aroma of heavy perfume, she sends a message. Be sure the message is not, ‘I’m heading for my Bible study group.” The seductress in Proverbs 7:10 is described as “dressed like a prostitute.” Bad message.
Principle: We communicate in many ways; words are only one of them. Make sure that all your languages speak in uniform purity.
[from “Wisdom for the Trenches” by Dr. Larry W. Poland]